Me: Finding Purpose

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 Happy Wednesday!


A little more about me to give context, I left full-time work in January 2023 when things started getting especially busy for the kids' medical schedules. I left part-time work, aka Army Reserves, in December of 2023 after accepting that the medical stuff was just going to have to be my priority for the foreseeable future and that they boys needed the stability of having one parent there all the time and not gone for a few days every couple of weeks. Also my folks were kind enough to be open with us and let us know that overnights with both boys was just too much, totally respect that but it meant that Grant or myself must be there for the kids. 

As someone who had always set their identity by her work, having no formal job has been confusing. I am confident in myself to know that I am good at whatever job I do, but I'd always defined job as my work outside of my family and for the first time I have truly been putting my family as my 100% of the time priority. 

I'd be lying if I said that I'd figured this out, but how I've been working through this, outside of a wonderful therapist, is by just taking baby steps. Yes, I am a stay-at-home mom now, however I still make an effort to do non-traditional things and to ensure that I get out of the house outside of the kids standard activities and appointments. Below are some of the things that I've been up to that have helped me transition my identity to just being me, not "insert Army rank here" Jess, not Corporate Jess, not even mom Jess... just Jess. I also acknowledge that we are VERY fortunate that Grant's salary from the Army and his Corporate job give us the flexibility for me to be present for the kids all day.


- Activities with my kids that aren't medical appointments, sports practice, or school like trips to the museum, running the airfield, the zoo, Reds' baseball game and ice cream as quality time with grandparents, etc...

- volunteering at the zoo, I've always wanted to get into this as a formal job (see my high school most likely of "Most Likely to Save a Caterpillar on a Run") and thankfully I've been fortunate to find a wonderful community within the zoo that has worked with my schedule to allow me ways to help out whether during weird hours or even remotely for some work

- YMCA - The childwatch has been so nice for being able to do some good workouts, take classes, and even do the remote stuff for the zoo without me feeling guilty of paying additional for childcare for an hour

- Church - We are in a different income position now and so instead of donating as much money we've contributed more with our time through and most of this takes place in the nursery where I can have the boys with me if needed, this totally feeds my enneagram 2 heart in helping 

These are some areas that I've focused on, but truly the big thing is switching my mindset from accomplishment and title to simply me as my identity. This is not to say that SAHM can't be an identity or that there's anything wrong with being a SAHM, I think for me I just started to realize that it wasn't a healthy mindset for me and so that needed to evolve. 

That's all, a bit of a ramble today, but I'm happy with where I am and where we're heading as a family.

💛 Jess



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